Anthropology Of Mormons

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (or the Mormon Church) is a global religion with over thirteen million members. In this paper, I will not be focusing on the rich and controversial history of the Church in the United States and abroad, but rather on the elements of doctrine and culture that affect how Mormons date, and specifically, how they date in the University Single’s Ward inBerkeley, California.
Marriage is an essential part of both Mormon culture and belief. Mormons believe that marriages performed in the temple (the most sacred place of Mormon worship, which only certain adult Mormons may enter) will last “for time and all eternity.” Mormon doctrine teaches that the binding power of the marriage ceremony extends beyond death and is still in effectin heaven, as do the family relationships of parent, child, and sibling. Mormons commonly describe this binding as families being “sealed” together. Even more central to the Church’s emphasis on marriage is the doctrine that only a person married in the temple can attain the highest level of exaltation. Mormons also believe that God’s commandment to Adam and Eve to “fill and replenish the earth”is still in effect. As a result, Mormons generally aspire to raising large families, a goal which encourages early marriages. Former Mormon prophet Brigham Young is famously supposed to have said that, “Single men over the age of 25 are a menace to society.” From this very slight overview of some Mormon doctrine and culture, we can conclude that Mormons have two essential values as concernmarriage: 1) marry young and 2) marry in the temple (marry Mormon). In order to facilitate these ideals, the Church has organized specialized wards (congregations) called singles’ wards. Singles’ wards operate in the same way as a normal or “family” ward, except that its members are all unmarried young adults between the ages of 18 and 31.
My research question upon entering the field is asfollows: How do Mormon culture and values, particularly those surrounding marriage, affect dating behavior and dating culture within the University Singles’ Ward of Berkeley, California?
As a life-long member of the Mormon Church, I do not consider myself compromised as an anthropologist. Before this study began, I had never had a single relationship with a Mormon or anybody else,and my only two dates were to school dances. I did attend another singles’ ward prior to the University Ward, but I was only there for a few months, attended very few activities outside of the usual Sunday worship, and generally stuck to a few close friends. As a VL (virgin lips), I considered myself as delving into Mormon dating culture more or less blind. As a Mormon girl with the goal of templemarriage, it was crucial that I decode the rules, risks, and rewards of dating in the University Ward, and then maybe, just maybe, I could get a boyfriend of my own.
Almost immediately upon entering the field, I realized a fundamental truth of the ward: it’s obsessed with the dating and relationships. This obsession manifests itself in three key ways: 1) Mormon dating vernacular2) gossip 3) play.
Romance is such a common, primary topic of discussion in the singles’ ward that a secondary language has emerged to describe it. Some of the most commonly used terms are as follows:
VL: virgin lips
FTC: flirt to convert
Peeing in the Pool: dating in the ward
Ninja Dating: dating in secret
Importing: bringing a significant other into the ward
Exporting:dating someone in another ward
Ward Shopping: attending many different wards in order to join the one with the most attractive singles
Ward Hopping: never settling down in one ward, but attending several different wards in order to maintain the largest possible dating pool
The three P’s: Planned, Paired off, Paid for - the three criteria necessary to define the time spent with a member of the...