TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
TEACHER: John, whyare you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formulafor water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing wehave today that we didn't have
ten years ago.
TEACHER: Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground thanyou are.
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: Interrupting......... No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE:All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie,do you know why his father didn't
LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand.
TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayersbefore
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as