School Violence

As terrible and frightening as incidents ofschool violence are, they are rare. Althoughit may not seem that way, the rate of crimeinvolving physical harm has been declining at U.S. schools sincethe early 1990s.According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention(CDC), fewer than 1% of all homicides among school-age childrenhappen on school grounds or on the way to and from school. Thevast majority of students will never experience violence at schoolor in college.
Still, it's natural for kids and teens — no matter where they go toschool — to worry about whether this type of incident maysomeday affect them. How can you help them deal with thesefears? Talking with kids about these tragedies, and what theywatch or hear about them, can put frightening information intocontext.
Talking to Your KidsIt's important for kids to feel like they can share their feelings,and know that their fears and anxieties are understandable.
Rather than waiting for your child to approach you, considerstarting the conversation. Ask kids what they understand aboutthese incidents and how they feel about them.Share your own feelings too — during a tragedy, kids may look toadults for their reactions. It helps kids to know that they are notalone in their anxieties. Knowing that their parents have similarfeelings will help kids legitimize their own.
At the same time, kids often need parents to help them feel safe.It may help to discuss in concrete terms what you have done andwhat the school is doing to help protect its students.

What Schools Are Doing
Many schools are taking extra precautions to keep students safe. Some have focused onkeeping weapons out by conducting random locker and bag checks, limiting entry and exit points at the school, and keeping the entryways under teacher supervision. Other schools use metal detectors.
Lessons on conflict resolution have been added to many schools' courses to help prevent troubled students from resorting to violence. Peer counseling and active peer programs help students become moreaware of the signs that a fellow student may be becoming more troubled or violent.
Another thing that helps make schools safer is greater awareness of problems like bullying and discrimination. Many schools now have programs to fight these problems, and teachers and administrators know more about protecting students from violence.
How Kids Perceive the News
Of course, you are not your child'sonly source of information about school shootings or other tragic events that receive media attention. Kids are likely to repeatedly encounter news stories or graphic images on television, radio, or the Internet, and such reports can teach them to view the world as a confusing, threatening, or unfriendly place.
Unlike movies or entertainment programs, news is real. But depending on a child's age ormaturity level, he or she may not yet understand the distinctions between fact and fantasy. By the time kids reach 7 or 8, however, what they watch on TV can seem all too real.
For some youngsters, the vividness of a sensational news story can be internalized and transformed into something that might happen to them. A child watching a news story about a school shooting might worry, "Could I benext? Could that happen to me?" TV has the effect of shrinking the world and bringing it into our living rooms.
By concentrating on violent stories, TV news can also promote a "mean-world" syndrome that can give kids a misrepresentation of what the world and society are actually like.

Discussing the News
To calm fears about the news, parents should be prepared to deliver what psychologistscall "calm, unequivocal, but limited information." This means delivering the truth, but in a way that fits the emotional level of your child. The key is to be truthful, but not go into more detail than your child is interested in or can handle.
Although it's true that some things can't be controlled, parents should still give kids the space to...