Why the guy code is oppressive

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  • Publicado : 11 de diciembre de 2011
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Men sometimes, from a social standpoint, are viewed as arrogant, aggressive and sometimes even as reckless. Michael Kimmel’s “Bros Before Hos: The Guy Code” explains the problematic of social constructions of Masculinity and the unconscious behavior men tend to follow. The behavior is called the “Guy Code” and it applies from generation to generation. Some experiences people live in life; forexample when people are really young and developing can be having acceptance from other people, as they tend to search for their personality. Although “the guy code” was a part of my life growing up, I reject the “guy code” because it objectifies women, and because men are constantly encouraged to follow the code.
In this essay, Kimmel explains that boys are getting influenced on how to be boys bydismantling the integration of a real personality and establishing the personality along creation myths. What “the guy code” establishes, according to Kimmel, is that “Boys don’t cry” in other words expressing emotion is bad, there is a real problem with this statement because it is a social myth in which men cannot demonstrate emotion or else they will be looked as weak or homosexual: “It’s Betterto be Mad than Sad”, this implies that aggression is desirable. “Don’t Get Mad----Get Even”, implies that revenge, is desirable which is bad advice, especially in the dysfunctional society that we live in. “Take it like a Man” this concept is being a unconscious masochist, suggesting that pain is good for you for the acceptance of a crowd. “He who has the Most Toys when he dies, Wins” translatesto who acquires the most material possessions is equal to masculine success; it can be argued that a large group of women are attracted to men for their material possessions. “Just do It”, or “Ride or Die” persuades men into not using their intelligence and not analyzing situations; also engage in risky behavior. “Size Matters” suggests that physical strength is desirable, and that men create adependency on their physical attributes instead of giving the intellect the value it deserves and proclaiming it as the most important quality. “I don’t Stop to Ask for Directions” the male sex does not want to create dependency; this is an ignorant remark because if someone does not know something they should be more humble and accepting for a fact they do not have the solution for the situation.As Socrates said “I just know that I know nothing”. “Nice Guys Finish Last” states that men have to be aggressive to achieve their objectives meaning that nice guys will be dethroned with force of power. “It’s All Good” encourages males to follow a “laid back conduct” not worrying about the future, instead living in the present. (Kimmel, Michael.)(45)
I encountered, the code growing up when beinga fifth grader. Observed how men who were aggressive achieved what they wanted, also got respect from fellow men. The kids never showed emotion, I felt alienated in this society of presumptuous masculinity that I could not follow up. Being a sentimental man does not mean you are gay; expressing emotion portrays personal security as individual of rejecting the gender myths of society. An example ofwhat is being explained can be this passage on the story: “A young black mother was concerned about a conversation she had with her husband a few nights earlier. It seems that her husband had taken their son to the barber, which she explained to me, is a central social institution in the African-American community. As the barber prepared the boy’s hair for treatment, using, apparently some heatand some painful burning chemicals, the boy began to cry. The barber turned to the boy’s father and pronounced, “This boy is a wimp!” He went on, “This boy has been spending too much time with his mama! Man, you need to put your foot down. You have to get this boy away from his mother!” That evening the father came home, visibly shaken by the episode, and announced to his wife that from that...
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