Effects

EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN
It is hard to imagine a more difficult transition for a child than to be a party to his or her parents' divorce. Divorce affects children differently, depending ontheir gender, age and stage of development. Their world, their security and their stability seems to fall apart when their parents divorce. The following ideas are universal characteristics thatresearchers can find among children of divorce.
Feelings
• They worry that their parents don't love them anymore and they feel abandoned. They feel like the parent who is leaving is divorcing them too.• They feel powerless and helpless because they can't get their parents back together.
• They feel angry although they may not express their anger.
• They often feel they are at fault. They maybelieve something they did or said caused a parent to leave.
• They grieve. Divorce is a loss in the lives of children and parents. They experience a grieving process very similar to mourning adeath.
• They experience conflicts of loyalty.

Behaviors
Acting out behavior ranges from very mild behavior, such as difficulty sleeping, to extremely destructive behavior, such as suicide, drugabuse, or violence.
Other behaviors may include problems in school, nervous habits, repetitive physical behaviors, and regressive behaviors such as bed-wetting, fears, and use of comfort items.Children may become clingy and whiny and they may need greater understanding of their moods and behavior. They have a greater need to be nurtured.
They may think they have to "take care" of their parents.Giving up one's childhood to care for emotionally troubled parents is a widespread characteristic in children of divorce.
These behaviors are common for children experiencing divorce. There is afalse assumption children are "naturally resilient" and can "get through" a divorce with little or no impact on their lives. Instead, they need support systems and individuals to help during the...