Love

Joshua Figueroa 801-08-1989
So You Think You Know Love
A lot of people think that they know everything there is to know about love, from the beginning to the end, and they think their definition and concept of love is the only one. With the discussion in class and the reading of the chapter 11 “Committed Romantic Relationships” there is a more profound and deep search of different waysof love from start to a possible finish. In the movie “The Backup Plan” there is some examples of the different types of love and some of the process of how people meet, fall in love, and end a relationship. For example there are 3 primary styles of love which are: ludus, storge, and eros; are found in this chapter in which some of these styles can be seen during the movie and probably it can beseen in one’s personal life without oneself recognizing it.
The 3 styles of love identify how a person is during his romantic relationships towards his or her partner; the ludus type see lovers as a game, something not to be taken seriously, for example in the movie there is a character named Clive who is a friend of the protagonist, it can be seen that he is a ludus type when the main characterZoe asks him if he can donate his sperm for her, and he makes fun of her and explains to her that he is on the verge of his sexual life and he doesn’t want to jeopardize it by having a baby even though he does not need to take care of him. Being a ludus type doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings, it’s just that you’re not looking for anything permanent; you just enjoy falling in love. In the moviewhen Zoe finally goes to the doctor so they can inseminate her she meets a guy named Stan and they start dating Clive starts to feel jealous but doesn’t acknowledge it, proving that he isn’t as cold as a ludus type is seemed.
Storge is the second style of love which is based on compatibility and tends to grow out of common interests, life goals, and values; in the movie, Nana which is thegrandmother of Zoe has been in a relationship with another man for more than 10 years and at the end of the movie is when she finally decides to marry him, this is an example of storge, showing how there are no fiery conflicts or erotic relationships because they were never committed. Even the old guy who is in love with Nana explains to Zoe that he has no problem waiting for Nana because he loves herand will wait for her no matter what. Of course being a storge does not mean that you have to wait that many years just to become engaged, it just means that you have to take your time to see things work out throughout your relationship as it develops. Eros is the third style of love which represents a passionate style of love that intensifies sexual, emotional, and intellectual attraction whichtend to fall in love fast; but this style is not seen in the movie because there are secondary types of love which includes mixtures of the primary styles of love.
The first type of a secondary style of love is called pragma which is a mixture of ludus and storge, this can be seen in Zoe, because she wants a man that meets her needs, although it may seem as a coldly practical person, it’s justthat she has a certain criteria before falling in love. For example in the movie there is a scene where Stan explains to Zoe that his goal is to open a cheese store/restaurant and she makes a bit of fun of him, showing that his goals does not meet her expectations. Mania is the second type of the secondary styles of love, this one is not seemed in the movie because it’s very extreme, this is amixture of ludus and eros; just because is not in a movie doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist in real life. Mania lovers are very passionate but are obsessive with their partners and tend to test their fidelity. The final secondary style of love is agape which is a mixture of storge and eros, this style can be seen in the movie represented by Stan, he tries and does almost everything to get Zoe’s...