Sincere Apology

I’m sorry :’/
I’m realizing now that you came to me this morning with the best intentions in the world, trying to make me feel better, trying to be a goodfriend… and I was a complete dick to you… and I’m so sorry I did that. I don’t know why, but I don’t want you to think that I don’t care about you.. Because I honestlydo :/
While I was taking my exam, I was a wreck.. I mean all sniffles. but then one of the passages on my exam had to do with cars and taxes in Australia. andit reminded me of you… and it reminded me how much I missed you.. and what you mean to me, and how lucky I am to be able to know you.. :/ and then I felt horriblefor getting mad at you… because you didn’t do anything wrong.
I guess I’m just disappointed that I can’t be all that I want to be for you. And I can’t say halfthe things I want to say to you because I don’t have that right.. and that frustrates me, because in my heart I believe we fit beautifully together. and justbecause you don’t see us in that way, doesn’t mean I get to be a dick. but I’m still happy that you’ve considered me a friend all this time.
You know how I feel aboutyou. And I understand your situation as well. and I can honestly say, being just your friend is not fulfilling enough for me. and I can’t keep living with thisidea in my head that will never come true. I just don’t want to hurt anymore. So whoever you choose to be with in your future, I hope they wholeheartedly love youas much I do. :’/
I’m just going to leave this here, for you to see at your own pace. If you choose to read it at all.
Sincerely,
Luan.

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