Frin
Páginas: 2 (469 palabras)
Publicado: 11 de diciembre de 2012
by Susan Stiffelman, MFT (Subscribe to Susan Stiffelman, MFT's posts)
Jan 3rd 2011 3:00PM
21Comments
Filed under: Expert Advice: Toddlers & Preschoolers
Dear AdviceMama,
My daughter hastwo boys, ages 6 and 4, who are sweet but quarrelsome, especially the 4-year-old. He has a strong personality and throws terrible tantrums in public and at home when he does not get what he wants. Hismom seems to have tried everything, but nothing works. Please advise.
Signed,
Frustrated Grandma
Dear Frustrated,
In truth, kids develop resilience by repeatedly living through thefrustrating experience of not getting what they want. But it's not easy to endure a child's displeasure, especially with children who have strong or explosive personalities.
Parents who tremble at theprospect of their youngster becoming upset end up resorting to reasoning -- or giving in -- to escape the temper tantrum drama. As your daughter has discovered, "trying everything" to stop a child'smeltdowns sometimes just makes them worse. Here's my advice:
• First, find out if your daughter wants your input! As sweet as it is that you want to help, make sure that you don't come across asmeddling or judgmental, and that she is genuinely open to your advice.
• Focus on avoiding tantrums by recognizing when your grandson is tired, hungry or over-stimulated. Meltdowns often happen as aresult of children being pushed beyond their physical or emotional limit. Recognize when your grandson has reached the end of his rope and don't take him on one more errand, or make him stay at the tableuntil everyone has finished their meal, if he's on the verge of falling apart.
• During a tantrum, stay nearby, but do not try to explain why he can't have what he wants. The biggest mistake mostparents make during temper tantrums is that they try to reason with a child who is temporarily "out of his mind." I don't mean that literally, or course, but when a child is emotionally wound up, he...
Jan 3rd 2011 3:00PM
21Comments
Filed under: Expert Advice: Toddlers & Preschoolers
Dear AdviceMama,
My daughter hastwo boys, ages 6 and 4, who are sweet but quarrelsome, especially the 4-year-old. He has a strong personality and throws terrible tantrums in public and at home when he does not get what he wants. Hismom seems to have tried everything, but nothing works. Please advise.
Signed,
Frustrated Grandma
Dear Frustrated,
In truth, kids develop resilience by repeatedly living through thefrustrating experience of not getting what they want. But it's not easy to endure a child's displeasure, especially with children who have strong or explosive personalities.
Parents who tremble at theprospect of their youngster becoming upset end up resorting to reasoning -- or giving in -- to escape the temper tantrum drama. As your daughter has discovered, "trying everything" to stop a child'smeltdowns sometimes just makes them worse. Here's my advice:
• First, find out if your daughter wants your input! As sweet as it is that you want to help, make sure that you don't come across asmeddling or judgmental, and that she is genuinely open to your advice.
• Focus on avoiding tantrums by recognizing when your grandson is tired, hungry or over-stimulated. Meltdowns often happen as aresult of children being pushed beyond their physical or emotional limit. Recognize when your grandson has reached the end of his rope and don't take him on one more errand, or make him stay at the tableuntil everyone has finished their meal, if he's on the verge of falling apart.
• During a tantrum, stay nearby, but do not try to explain why he can't have what he wants. The biggest mistake mostparents make during temper tantrums is that they try to reason with a child who is temporarily "out of his mind." I don't mean that literally, or course, but when a child is emotionally wound up, he...
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