Mi vida

em over. Lets refresh your memory.." I laughed, the sheer sight of them making me crave their comfort. I slid from Derek's bed as he tossed them over and without a care in the world I stripped of my jeans right there and changed into them. It's not like it's a big deal, he's seen me before.

However this time he didn't tackle me onto the bed and place kisses all over my collarbone, neck andface, he only tackled me after I had the elastic band up around my narrow waist. There was a known line of just how much was appropriate and those feverish batch of kisses was on the side labeled 'too much', and I was glad Derek stayed away from that because I really didn't want this to turn into one of those awkward car rides home after a pretty good afternoon.

"Can you stay for a movie, Megs?"he questioned suddenly, raising his dark eyebrows.

I watched him deviously smirk for a moment, narrowing my eyes in a fair skepticism before finally letting the smile that was begging to be seen appear on my face. "Are you taking about the movie I think you're talking about?" I questioned, raising an eyebrow right back at him.

"Does that mean you have time to find out?"

"Depends.""I hate you." he laughed, shaking his head.

"Can you find ten things you hate about me?" I questioned teasingly, raising an eyebrow.

"'I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even a little bit, not even at all.'" he quoted, moving from the bed to pop in the DVD. I smiled with excitement, climbing beneath the covers without a second thought finding comfort in the bed I haven't laid in in overfour years. Just like his whole room his sheets let out a new wave of his cologne whenever you moved around, intoxicating my senses in a sweet way but in the back of my mind I craved the scent of Nicholas' cologne.

I lifted up the blankets when he rounded the bed to find a way next to me again, his warmth suddenly more effective than the comforter itself although it didn't please thebutterflies enough to get them started. Derek's arm found its way around me after turning the lamp off on his night table, and just before the movie started he pressed a warm kiss to my forehead lovingly before letting himself sink a little further beneath the blankets next to me.

In that moment I knew I had one of my bandaids peeled off, and though the scar was there it was less evident but I'm nowwearing it proudly because I know I'll be able to say I still have a best friend to go with this particular scar because I found enough courage to face one of my fears, even if it did take me four years.

****

I took a deep breath in, letting my eyes flutter to expose the tasteful brown walls that surrounded me the white sheer curtains letting a good amount of light seep into the room Irediscovered as of yesterday. I peeked next to me cautiously, making sure every movement I made was soft and suddenly the missing warmth of Derek made sense because Derek was no where to be found.

Normally, I would be upset over this but it didn't seem to matter to me as much as it used to. My only fear was he suddenly feared last night and how close we became again, and the thought he kept out ofsight all last night hit him this morning. That thought of course regarding the fact that I'm going to disappear from his life again today, and by tomorrow I'll be across the country again resuming the life I built on my own with the help of Joseph out there.

I sat up straight, rubbing my burning eyes thanks to the contacts I unfortunately fell asleep with in my eyes last night. I tried toblink some of the moisture into my eyes, becoming half successful which left my hands to run through my hair that I pulled up in a messy bun, using the spare hair tie I've kept around my wrist all week. I sighed just as Derek walked in, holding a bottle of water in one hand with a glass of what looked to be orange juice in the other.

"Morning," he said softly, his voice groggy which told me he...