None

Murphy's laws
• If anything can go wrong, it will
• Laundry Math:1 Washer + 1 Dryer + 2 Socks = 1 Sock
• Anyone who isn't paranoid simply isn't paying attention.
• The difference between Stupidity and Genius is that Genius has its limits.
• Its never so bad it couldn't be worse.
• Every problem is replaceable with a bigger one.
• And on the eighth day Godsaid;"O.K. Murphy, you take over!
• Cheer up, the worst is yet to come...
• Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
• If all else fails, hit it with a big hammer.
• When things go from bad to worse, the cycle repeats.
• If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong
• If anything just cannot go wrong,it will anyway
• If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop
Corollary: It will be impossible to fix the fifth fault, without breaking the fix on one or more of the others
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse
• If everything seems to begoing well, you have obviously overlooked something
• Nature always sides with the hidden flaw
Corollary: The hidden flaw never stays hidden for long.
• Mother nature is a bitch.
• Things get worse under pressure.
• Everything goes wrong all at once.
• Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
• Enough research will tend to support whatever theory.• Research supports a specific theory depending on the amount of funds dedicated to it.
• In nature, nothing is ever right. Therefore, if everything is going right ... something is wrong.
• Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
• It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
• Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.• Rule of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer.
Corollary: Provided, of course, that you know there is a problem.
• Nothing is as easy as it looks.
• Everything takes longer than you think.
• Everything takes longer than it takes.
• If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
• Whenever you set out todo something, something else must be done first.
• Every solution breeds new problems.
• The legibility of a copy is inversely proportional to its importance.
• no matter how perfect things are made to appear, Murphy's law will take effect and screw it up.
• You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
• The chance of the buttered side ofthe bread falling face down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
• The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
• A falling object will always land where it can do the most damage.
• A shatterproof object will always fall on the only surface hard enough to crack or break it.
• A paint drip willalways find the hole in the newspaper and land on the carpet underneath (and will not be discovered until it has dried).
• A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) - unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).
• If a dish is dropped while removing it from thecupboard, it will hit the sink, breaking the dish and chipping or denting the sink in the process.
• A valuable dropped item will always fall into an inaccessible place (a diamond ring down the drain, for example) - or into the garbage disposal while it is running.
• If you use a pole saw to saw a limb while standing on an aluminum ladder borrowed from your neighbor, the limb will...