Iuhbi

The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs!
by A. Wolf
as told to Jon Scieszka
Reader's Theater by Bridget Scofinsky
Characters: Wolf, Officer 1, Officer 2, Officer 3, Narrator 1, Narrator 2, Narrator 3,
Narrator 4, Second Pig, Third Pig, Reporter 1 and Reporter 2
Scene 1
Wolf: Everybody knows the story of the Three Little Pigs. Or at least they think they do.
But I'll let you in on a littlesecret. Nobody knows the real story, because nobody has ever
heard my side of the story.
Officer #1: Name?
Wolf: I'm the wolf. Alexander T. Wolf. You can call me Al. I don't know how this whole Big
Bad Wolf thing got started, but it's all wrong.
Officer #2: I see. And what makes you so sure?
Wolf: Maybe it's because of our diet. Hey, it's not my fault wolves eat cute little animals
likebunnies, sheep and pigs. That's just the way we are.
Officer #3: Can we stick to the story, please?
Wolf: If cheeseburgers were cute, folks would probably think you were Big and Bad, too.
But like I was saying, the whole Big Bad Wolf thing is wrong. The real story is about a
sneeze and a cup of sugar.
Scene 2
Narrator #1: Way back in Once Upon a Time time, A. Wolf was making a birthday cake forhis dear old granny.
Wolf: I had a terrible sneezing cold.
Narrator # 2 : He ran out of sugar.
Wolf: So I walked down the street to ask my neighbor for a cup of sugar.
Narrator #3: Now this neighbor was a pig.
Wolf: And he wasn't too bright either.
Narrator #4: He had built his whole house out of straw.
Wolf: Can you believe it? I mean who in his right mind would build a house of straw?Narrator #1: So of course the minute he knocked on the door, it fell right in. He claimed
he didn't want to just walk into someone else's house.
Wolf: So I called, "Little Pig, Little Pig, are you in?
Narrator #2: No answer.
Narrator #3: He was just about to go home without the cup of sugar for his dear old
granny's birthday cake.
Wolf: That's when my nose started to itch. I felt a sneezecoming on. Well I huffed. And I
snuffed. And I sneezed a great sneeze.
Narrator #4: The whole darn straw house fell down. And right in the middle of the pile of
straw was the First Little Pig-dead as a doornail.
Wolf: He had been home the whole time.
Narrator #1: It seemed like a shame to leave a perfectly good ham dinner lying there in
the straw.
Wolf: So I ate it up. Think of it as a bigcheeseburger just lying there.
Narrator #2: He was feeling a little better.
Wolf: But I still didn't have my cup of sugar.
Narrator #3: So he went to the next neighbor's house.
Narrator #4: This neighbor was the First Little Pig's brother.
Wolf: He was a little smarter, but not much.
Narrator #1: He had built his house of sticks.
Wolf: I rang the bell on the stick house.
Narrator#2: Nobodyanswered.
Wolf: Mr. Pig, Mr. Pig, are you in?
Mr. Pig: Go away wolf. You can't come in. I'm shaving the hairs on my chinny chin chin."
Narrator #3: He has just grabbed the doorknob when he felt another sneeze coming on.
Wolf: I huffed. And I snuffed. An I tried to cover my mouth, but I sneezed a great sneeze.
Narrator #4: You're not going to believe it, but this guy's house fell down just likehis
brother's.
Wolf: When the dust cleared, there was the Second Little Pig-dead as a doornail. Wolf's
honor.
Narrator #1: Now you know food will spoil if you just leave it out in the open.

Wolf: So I did the only thing there was to do.
Narrator #2: He had dinner again.
Wolf: Think of it as a second helping.
Narrator #3: He was getting awfully full.
Narrator #4: But his cold wasfeeling a little better.
Wolf: But I still didn't have that cup of sugar for my dear old granny's birthday cake.
Narrator #1: So he went to the next house.
Narrator #2: This guy was the First and Second Little Pig's brother.
Wolf: He must have been the brains in the family.
Narrator #3: He had built his house of bricks.
Wolf: I knocked on the brick house.
Narrator #4: No answer.
Wolf: I...