Lo Bueno

-It’s not an attitude, it’s the way I am.
-You just lost the chance you never had !
-I'm not the girl your mom warned you about; her imagination was never this good.
-Ugliness is superior tobeauty because it lasts.
-I know I'm not perfect, but I'm so close it scares me!
-Smile - it confuses people.
-Don't talk about yourself so much ... we'll do that when you leave.
-Laugh at yourproblems, everybody else does.
-A thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
-Seems like you had an extra bowl of stupid this morning.
-I'd like to see things your way, but I'mnot sure if I can stick my head that far up my ass.
-Don't go away mad, just go away!
-Oh, I'm sorry. Did I look interested?
-My door is always open, so feel free to leave!
-What if you're in hell,and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?
-I’m great in bed – I can sleep for days.
-Ladies, if you wear a full face of makeup to the gym in the morning, I'm going to assume you justfinished your work shift as a prostitute
-I have PMS and a handgun. Any questions?
-Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once!
-If life gives you lemons, stick them down your shirt and makeyour boobs look bigger.
-You're only bad if you're caught ... so that makes me a good girl? Right?
-Please don't interrupt me while I'm ignoring you.
-It’s not the jeans that make your butt lookfat.
-When you go to bed tonight,Dream of me …And when you wake up. You’ll realize …You can’t have me!
-Don't think of it as losing, think of it as getting beat by a girl …
-You can't argue with asick mind.
-If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk!
-I'm sorry, I can't be mean to you. It's be kind to animals week.
-I AM WHAT I AM … so your approval isn't needed!
-I’m notignoring you, you’re just insignificant!
-I'm not looking for a relationship right now. And by "right now" I mean "with you".
-Your constant status updates remind us all how crushingly boring your...