Sam Fuller: Not necessarily.
Gracie Hart: Uh, excuse me, private conversation in progress.
Joel: People care about people who care about themselves.
Gracie Hart: Please be careful! My guns are in the Fendi!
Gracie Hart: Peoplemay care about people who care about themselves, but I just don't care about those people.
Joel: How do you feel about a push-up bra?
Gracie Hart: How would you feel about a genital-shocking taser gun?
Joel: I'm open to it.
Gracie Hart: ...Okay.
Sam Fuller: I don't recall seeing a skinny, white-ass girl growing up at the table.
Gracie Hart: Okay, first of all... thank you forcalling me skinny.
Gracie Hart: How about a real sorry?
Sam Fuller: Come again?
Gracie Hart: You heard me. I said how about a real sorry.
Sam Fuller: You are about to feel some real pain if you don't back off
Gracie Hart: You don't want to talk to me about pain, sister. I invented pain alright.
Sam Fuller: You didn't just call me sister, because I don't recall seeing a little skinny asswhite girl around the table growing up.
Gracie Hart: HEY! First of all thank you for calling me skinny, second of all what is your problem and third of all you'd better apologize to me.
Cheryl: We've been kidnapped and there?s two men here who say they're going to kill us by Friday at midnight. But I don?t want anyone to pay them any money. Because that would be giving into terrorism and I?mMiss United States and I stand for fairness, decency and the American Way
[starts to sing]
Cheryl: ?From sea to shining sea...?
Gracie Hart: I wish you wouldn?t kiss my watch. It?s not water resistant.
Gracie Hart: I don?t cry! I don?t even have tear ducts.
Cheryl: [after Gracie rescues her from the sinking ship] You must be really tired of saving my life.
Gracie Hart: No no,it's good exercise
Gracie Hart: [going through the office talking with McDonald] Sir, I went through a makeover for the pageant. I'm still getting hairspray off my butt!
[everyone in the office stops talking]
Gracie Hart: What? It - it prevents the swimsuit from, from riding up, thank you!
Cheryl: We've been kidnapped and there's two men here who say they're going to kill us by Friday atmidnight. But I don't want anyone to pay them any money. Because that would be giving into terrorism. And I'm Miss United States and I stand for fairness, decency and the American Way.
[Starts to sing]
Cheryl: From Sea to Shining Sea!
Gracie Hart: I wish you wouldn't kiss my watch. It's not water resistant.
Gracie Hart: I don't cry! I don't even have tear ducts.
Sam Fuller: Okay,look! I don't work for you and you don't work for me. We're a team. Get it? As in 'I will kick your sorry ass if you don't listen to me' team.
Gracie Hart: Well first of all, if you remember correctly it was 'skinny' ass. And second of all what is your problem Fuller? DO you honestly feel it's okay to go around harrasing people and bashing their faces in? Because guess what Fuller, you will nevermake it in this bureau if you don't start usuing your head.
[Sam Headbuts Gracie]
Gracie Hart: What, you start listening to me now?
Gracie Hart: You can do this. You know you can because you are Sam Fuller FBI. Nothing and nobody scares you. And I am Gracie Hart and at this moment I am also big bird and nothing scares me except... except loosing Cheryl, because having a friend like herand having any friend for me is a really really rare thing. Okay?
Sam Fuller: Okay but I am not singing.
Dolly Impersonator: And here's the fabulous Tina Turner.
Gracie Hart: Everything's going to be okay, just be Tina - -ish.
Collins: Why don't we get you to the hotel while I give the agents a debriefing?
Joel: Oh, that's too bad. It's been months since I've had a good debriefing....