Adolescentes

“Adults belittle the love that teenagers experience because they don’t remember it themselves. They’re logical in their memories; they can recall how the arguments started and who wasat fault, and how they came to break up in the middle of the hallway at school, embarrassing themselves for the rest of the year. But they forget all the important things. They forgetthe first shy look, how their pulse rose when their hands met for the first time, how their toes curled in excitement and their lips swung up into a grin. They cannot remember thewarm summer nights of shy touching beneath the duvet, the sweat they kissed off of their lover’s lips and the shivers they felt when dozing off in a hug. The dreams of marriage and sevenkids weren’t silly - they seemed very real when discussed in the evening while writing on an English essay or preparing for the morning’s class in biology. The drama was painful andthe tears never ending when a friend said a word too much, broke a secret, broke the two of you apart. There was nothing logical or structural about those relationships, but they were asreal as the sound of your heart beating.
Do you remember? Because I remember. You were the present and the future, but I left you in the past. I’m a grown up now, Arthur, but Iremember because I never was good at logical thinking. When I try to make a timeline of words it becomes pictures of us; at the beach, skinny dipping; in school, holding hands beneath thedesk; at a birthday party, sharing a slice of cake; in bed at night, whispering secrets; in the rain by the train station, kissing. Maybe I never truly grew up, I can still weep aseverything seems so real to me. But to you-:
“Do you remember when we thought we were in love?” you smile. “Silly teenagers. That’s what we were. Silly teenagers.” Silly, silly me.