Much Ado About Nothing

Much Ado About Nothing
Act 1

Scene 1

(Before Leonato’s house)
(Enter Leonato, Hero, and Beatrice, with Messenger)
Narration one.(possible played by the messenger) The time is 1945. The place the North End of Boston(or Messina?). A messenger has arrived to announce the return from battle of the prominent Don Pedro, his brother Don John and several soldiers including Benedick and Claudio.Beatrice, niece to Leonato and cousin to Hero, speaks out.
Beatrice. I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the war or no?
Messenger.I know none of that name, lady: there was none such in the army of any sort.
Leonato.What is he that you ask for, niece?
Hero. My cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua.
Messenger.O, he’s returned; and as pleasant as ever he was.
Beatrice.I pray you,how many has he killed and eaten in these wars? But haw many has he killed? For indeed I promised to eat all of his killing.
Leonato.Faith, niece, you tax Signior Benedick too much; but he’ll be meet with you, I doubt it not.
Messenger.He has done good service, lady, in these wars.
Beatrice.You had musty victual, and he has holp to eat it.: he is a very valiant trencherman; he has an excellentstomach.
Messenger. And a good soldier too, lady.
Beatrice. And a good soldier to a lady: but what is he to a lord?
Messenger.A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all honourable virtues.
Beatrice.It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man: but for the stuffing,-well, we are all mortal.

Leonato.You must not, sir, mistake my niece. There is a kind of merry war betwixtSignior Benedick and her: they never meet but there’s a skirmish of wit between them.
Messenger.I will hold friends with you, lady.
Beatrice. Do, good friend.
Leonato.You will never run mad, niece.
Beatrice.No, not till a hot January.
Messenger. Don Pedro is approached.
(Enter Don Pedro, Don John, Claudio, Benedick)
Don Pedro.Good Signior Leonato, you are come to meet your trouble: thefashion of the world is to avoid cost, and you encounter it.
Leonato. Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of your grace: for trouble being gone, comfort should remain; but when you depart from me, sorrow abides and happiness takes his leave.
Don Pedro. Your embrace your charge too willingly. I think this is your daughter.
Leonato.Her mother has many times told me so.
Benedick.Were you indoubt, sir, that you asked her?
Leonato.Signior Benedick, no; for then were you a child.
Beatrice.I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior Benedick: nobody marks you.
Benedick.What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living?
Beatrice.Is it possible disdain should die while she has such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick? Courtesy itself must convert to disdain, if you come inher presence.
Benedick.Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I am loved of all ladies, only you excepted: and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart; for, truly, I love none.
Leonato.(to Don John) Let me bid you welcome, my lord: being reconciled to the prince your brother, I owe you all duty.
Don John.I thank you: I am not of many words, but I thank you.Leonato.Please it your grace lead on?
Don Pedro.Your hand, Leonato; we will go together.
(exeunt all except Benedick and Claudio)
Claudio.Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of Signior Leonato?
Benedick.I noted her not; but I looked on her.
Claudio.Is she not a modest young lady?
Benedick.Do you question me, as an honest man should do, for my simple true judgment; or would you have me speak aftermy custom, as being a professed tyrant to their sex?
Claudio.No; I pray thee speak in sober judgment. In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I looked on.
Benedick.I can see yet without spectacles and I see no such matter: there’s her cousin, an she were not possessed with a fury, exceeds her as much in beauty as the first of May doth the last December. But I hope you have no intent to...