Guión Padre De Familia

Family Guy “CHRIS GRIFFIN VS. THE WORLD”

Written by Ryan Sasinowski Created by Seth MacFarlane

1 ACT ONE FADE IN: 1. INT. LIVING ROOM, GRIFFIN HOUSE – NIGHT 1.

CHRIS, BRIAN, and STEWIE are watching the TV. On the screen, TOM TUCKER is wrapping up a news segment. TOM TUCKER So there, you have it. In the animal kingdom, size does matter. More news after the break. The news cuts tocommercial. It's a commercial for an eHarmoney type site, only for henchmen. A HOST is on screen. HOST When it comes to your henchmen needs, look no further than eHenchmen.com. ON SCREEN-A generic looking BAD GUY is shaking hands with a GUY IN A SUIT. The guy goes out the door to a waiting room filled with a handful of guys dressed exactly like him. He gives them a thumbs up. He's got the job. The otherguys give him thumbs up back. The bad guy comes out of his office, motioning for another guy to come in. HOST (CONT'D) For more than forty years, eHenchmen has been taking all the footwork out of finding a new employer set on revenge, or even world domination. HENCHMAN TALKING HEAD -HENCHMAN Before I heard about this site, I was really in a rut. (MORE) (CONTINUED)

2 1. CONTINUED: HENCHMAN(CONT'D) I thought that after the rebels destroyed the Death Star for the second time, that I'd have to really comb the want ads for work. But thanks to eHenchmen, they were able to put me in contact with another employer in just days. DR. EVIL TALKING HEAD -DR. EVIL You know, eHenchman makes the whole hiring process so easy. You just write a description of what your organization is, and what you'relooking for, and that's all there is to it. It's so easy, a baby could do it. Especially...an evil baby. DARTH VADER TALKING HEAD -DARTH VADER With eHenchmen, it makes it so easy to find the good help you're looking for, without all the hassle. A GUY is sitting at a COMPUTER, reading a web ad aloud to his wife behind him. POTENTIAL HENCHMAN Honey, look at this. Wanted: Hard-working, self-motivatedworkers for job at space station. Must have a sense of adventure. Must be willing to work weekends, possibility of conflict, low-risk. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 1.

3 1. CONTINUED: (2) POTENTIAL HENCHMAN (CONT'D) Casual Fridays. Marksmanship preferred, but not required. POTENTIAL HECHMAN'S WIFE That sounds perfect. (to camera) Thanks to eHenchmen, we never have to worry about where the next paycheckcomes from. Thanks eHenchmen. (gives thumbs up) CUT TO: STATIC. The TV gets turned off. WIDER –PETER comes into the living room. BRIAN/CHRIS/STEWIE Hey. We were watching that. What the Hell?! PETER Everybody out. It's time for our tradition of Bad Movie Tuesday. BRIAN Peter, that's not a tradition, you just made it up today. PETER And? What's your point? BRIAN It can't be a tradition if you justmake it up. 1.

(CONTINUED)

4 1. CONTINUED: (3) PETER (deadpan) You're losin' me, here. (excited, to guests) We're in here, everybody. With that, JOE, QUAGMIRE, BONNIE, MORT, and LOIS come in. Peter sets up an EASEL with a movie poster on it. It's his makeshift MARQUEE. The poster is for the movie The Room, complete with Tommy Wiseau's mug plastered in the middle of it. Quagmire takes noticeof this. QUAGMIRE Geez, Peter, who the Hell's that guy? PETER I dunno. This was the only poster for the movie I could find. Brian walks over to the marquee. BRIAN Oh my God, Peter. You're watching The Room? PETER Yeah, why? BRIAN Peter, that movie is the Citizen Kane of bad movies. PETER It can't be that bad, some guy online was saying I had to see this one. BRIAN Peter, he was probably saying youhad to see it in order for you to believe how bad it is. (CONTINUED) 1.

5 1. CONTINUED: (4) QUAGMIRE C'mon, if it was bad, they wouldn't have released. BRIAN (beat) That didn't stop Transformers 2. PETER Yeah, you're right about that. But this'll be fun. Come on. Peter clicks the TV on. All the guests are now sitting on the couch, on the floor, or in chairs. We HEAR the first scene of the...