Encuentros del habla

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  • Publicado : 13 de febrero de 2011
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Find out about the person you'll be talking to before you actually talk to them, if you can. If it's someone who you work with, or go to school with, look at their department website and see if they have any projects in the works. If the person is a mutual acquaintance, ask your friend what this person does for a living and how they know eachother. (Do not, however, dig any deeper than these suggestions. Coming into a conversation equipped with personal information about that person comes off as creepy. That means researching a person on social networks before talking to them for the first time is not okay!) The information you get can be good for starting conversations:
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* "I was looking at the biochemistry department website and saw that you're working on a pretty interesting thesis! How'd you come to choose that topic?"
* "Isaw on the office memo that you're working on the outreach project for local schools. How's that going?"
* "Milly here told me that you went skydiving!"
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Ask questions. What do they like to do? What sort of things have they done in their lives? What is happening to them now? Whatdid they do today or last weekend? Identify things about them that you might be interested in hearing about, and politely ask questions. Remember, there was a reason that you wanted to talk to them, so obviously there was something about them that you found interesting. However, try to space out your questions or they'll feel like you're interrogating them which is very bad and closes offfriendships.

* See How to Come Up with Good Conversation Topics for ideas.
* Ask clarifying questions. If the topic seems to be one they are interested in, ask them to clarify what they think or feel about it. If they are talking about an occupation or activity you do not understand, take the opportunity to learn from them. Everyone loves having a chance to teach another willing andinterested person about theirhobby or subject of expertise.
* Try to get them talking about something they enjoy thinking about and something that you're interested in hearing or else the conversation isn't fulfilling and one of you will feel unsatisfied with it.
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Listen. This is the mostimportant part of any conversation. Pay attention to what is being said. Make acknowledging noises or movements to indicate that you are still listening. A conversation will go nowhere if you are too busy thinking of anything else, including what you plan to say next. If you listen well, the other person's statements will suggest questions for you to ask. Allow the other person to do most of thetalking. They will often not realize that it was they who did most of the talking, and you get the credit for being a good conversationalist - which of course, you are!

* Practice active listening skills. Part of listening is letting the other person know that you are listening. Make eye contact. Nod. Say "Yes," "I see," "That's interesting," or something similar to give them clues thatyou are paying attention and not thinking about something else - such as what you are going to say next.
* Paraphrase back what you have heard, using your own words. This seems like an easy skill to learn, but takes some practice to master. Conversation happens in turns, each person taking a turn to listen and a turn to speak or to respond. It shows respect for the other person when you...
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